Friends and Family,
I want to start by thanking every single one of you who has supported me through prayer, guidance, and just for being a shoulder to “cry on” so to speak. I honestly am blown away and completely filled with joy to see the things God is doing in the lives of those close to me, and I’m super excited for what is to come for all of you!
With a semi-broken heart, I am letting all of you know that I am no longer going to Costa Rica. Some of you know in great detail what is going on, and some of you are reading this scratching your head wondering what the heck happened. I think I am in the second group- wondering what the heck happened. I have a million questions and not many answers. What I can tell you is God has blessed me greatly with the ability to discern and know what looks suspicious and what does not. The only explanation I can offer right now is God’s timing does not want me to leave the country just yet.
I am not discouraged from going anywhere, in fact the opposite. I had a horrible experience, but I am not deterred from following what God wants me to do. Already there a couple options for me coming up in the winter. I will give more details as God leads me to what He wants for me.
Honestly, this is hard for me right now. First of all, I was looking forward to working with these kids. Kids have always been near and dear to my heart, and knowing I won’t see their faces is a tough pill to swallow. I know it’s not God’s will for me to be there, and that certainly softens the blow, but I still have a bit of an ache in my heart for them. Second of all, I feel very hurt and very lied to and mislead by an organization I trusted. I do ask for prayer in that, I don’t want to be bitter or angry. A good way to pray against bitterness, a good friend taught me, is to pray in the opposite spirit. In this example, pray for me to see the hope, pray for wisdom and guidance for those who caused the hurt, and pray for me to understand and clearly see God’s active hand moving in my life.
This is NOT the end, only the start of something beautiful God is doing in my life. I can’t even tell you the change I’ve seen in myself from just even a year ago. A year ago, I never would have even considered leaving my comfort zone, my safety net, of my hometown. I can say that my new comfort zone, my safety net, is Jesus. And being able to say that, and believe it in my heart, has changed my life in so many ways.
Thank you for praying for me, thank you for loving me, and thank you for pointing me to God in everything thus far. This trip may have failed, but HE certainly has not. I will keep you all updated on things as they come up!
"Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose trust is the LORD.8 He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit." Jeremiah 17:7-8
In Christ, Jess
No comments:
Post a Comment